So I found this....

As I was Eddying around in my computer files yesterday, as I see today it's about what ever is happening has to happen...it's my process.  Acceptance.

But no for real I found this.

• Why do we make our art? 
• Can it be to communicate without words? 
• Can it be to respond, understand and document our lives? 
• It's not a race, Slow down and take the time needed.....
• Learn to love the process. 
• Ask the question- Do I like this?  Yes or No
• Create interest by making differences. 
• Be the change in your art and through your art. 
• Let go of instant gratification. 

I so need to find this yesterday,   I was inspired to write this out on my dry eraser board I bought with me to Nebraska's workshop last year.  On the Last day when are all face focus in process and what I personal gathered from the group of women, I present these questions and statements.

I can only learn to love myself if I am willing to learn who I am....all of me that is.  

Unearthing again...digging deeper, revealing parts, exposing others...

Could this be what and why one creates?   Oh I'm sure and so much more.  For each individual person that finds themselves in the arena to create there's that many more reason why?  

I have the right to want what I want and to feel the way I feel.  I may not choose to act on those feelings or desires, but I won't hide them from myself.  They are part of me. 

This above all: to thine own self be true."  

William Shakespeare

Being true to ourselves is an ongoing process and one that keeps revealing if we are willing to look and know thy self.

A peep talk to self...

Call it obsessed or just enjoying the process of hand stitching this little creatures.  I decided to create a heart on the tummy patch first before I sewed in on with the arms.

You see I was Eddying around yesterday because two of my classes that I offered this Winter season didn't go.   I had been watching the enrollment stats and I kind of knew it...despite the marketing on social media and my news letters.  In my morning pages what was revealed is I felt frozen in the water as to what kind of class could I teach that would go?   Then it downed on me there isn't that perfect class that will fill and I couldn't move forward on preparing for a class because of this kind of thinking.  There are tons of reason why....and to go and try to analyze it to pinpoint what it was so I don't do that again...is crazy town behavior.


So before I sat down to sew the little mouse with a heart revealed...I look through a few books I have, (silent mentors, other artist books) for ideas and what I liked in their work.

Gathering papers, making a mark on them, altering the colors on the surface, tearing them, stitching them with a machine or hand stitching is Oh so cool these days.   I've been creating artwork to hang on the walls for so long and come to point of polished works...No ego just a truth for my work as of all that I can do to bring it to a level of completions and with quality and presentation.  Now I want Raw, threads hanging, not protections....swinging  to the other side and not so worried about it...Yes I'm exploring...crazy town could be but looking for more character in my work. More drama in the process making and presenting I guess...Oh Heck I really don't know....

So back to preparing for a class,  I also realized that to set up a class in the written form like a pdf to handout I am in deep process visually in my mind and this is so much like creating the art itself...I enjoy doing this just as much creating the art...so when yesterday I was frozen in perfection....I made me mad at myself and frustrated....yes I did turn to some Frito's/corn chips  I bought at Aldi's...

I found this all out in processes that I also enjoy is the morning pages and working with my hands...their this extension of my being, my soul.  When I was little...not understanding but when I was observing something I didn't get the full understanding unless I touched it.    Oh Children don't touch the art !!! there I was sneaking around to just touch it to truly understand.

I am a textile learner....writing notes, or keeping the fingers and hands busy in so many different ways.

The universe has been feeding me messengers that I'm on the right path....I still need to ask every morning what path this is but I'm going to trust in the uncertainty....though the stress of it all does almost kill me, this will be a new learning process to believe, know and trust your on the right path.

The pressure of this all is $ and it's been $ this for over 24 years....you would think as an artist I would have this whole system beat.  Along the way though dreams have come through in small and big forms...so there you go...swaying back and forth and Eddying around will get you somewhere, Right?