Touching base on a different pleasure

So this is a wild angle.....

I've been creating art for along time and creative in some sort or another.  Working on this tipi has me touching base on some creating at a deep level and has me asking for what?   Distorted in it's questioning.  Hear me out,  I always had a agenda to the creating...as of for someone, for sale, etc. Looking at my time spent, the amount of supplies purchased and then final cost of the merchandise after it was finished and what I would sell it for.   It's been a very...very...long time when I did something for myself.  It still hard to believe I have this tipi and I'm really babying it like it's my new baby. And thinking of babies...I've had four of them and as I've been painting the squares on here I though how I'm always drawn to the number four...yes you guested it for my four children...simple right but they are part of my personal symbols so why not use them.   I've got thoughts about each part of this and as it comes together I'm sure the bigger picture  of this all will be revealed and I'll have a good understanding of it...just trusting my instincts....as you can see also at the end of the image trail here is a piece of my next totem I started...with the big circle on it....it's on hold...yikes a bit of concern as I don't want to wait to long.

Well I've got the other half of the cream yellow to do today and hopefully get that small red square on there too...shoot...I also need to make myself a morning page journal too..on my last signature.

Time to get moving...