Wisdom, Ego is Lying, Self Talk

When you read... Wisdom is everywhere, all the time; in the cosmos and in you.  You recognized it as a powerful feeling that something is right for you.   Listening to your inner voice, unhindered by hope, limited belief or peer pressure. Let it show you the way that connects with your unique blueprint. When you feel that something is right, it will turn into a deep inner knowing. 

For the past year almost it feels like I've not had to haul stuff all over the place.  I did that for my job of teaching art classes in different location.  The workshops have been cancelled because of Covid this year too.   I took it as a break...and now the places I would teach at are trying to get themselves going again and bring teachers and students back in.   

Workshops though I do enjoy because is away of artistical running away and doing what I love to do. 

The morning pages this morning were a ramble of words from my ego...You best do this or you will not be who you are. As a Collage artist and teacher.  Can I say that's Bullshit !! Just because I don't do what I have been doing doesn't mean I'm not who I am,  Collage artist and an instructor by a natural way, nurturing and giving. this was taught to me on a porch swing passed down my grandfather...it's not going away.  When you say, No to something and stay open for some yes's it's scary.  But you know it's right. 

The nudges and knowing....I've always acted on hunches and nudges.  I've taken risks to see if it will go...as a class and workshop.  Sometimes not and most of the time Yes.  So Wisdom is the experiences you carry with you from life events.  Wisdom is not a guarantee that it will always work out, it's not trauma though either.  Though our trauma can awaken us to our past experience it's us that has to decided if we are willing to risk and grow again.   This year has been a risk and growing kind of year. 

I didn't choose to not teach in person this year that was made for us and many other jobs.  But I have a choice now if I want to continue the way I had in the past. I've always taking a look like this periodically. Must be time again.... 

Where you put your energy it will grow. And your attention is best serviced by how?  These are some questions I'm asking myself.  Technology has made it possible to do teaching of art on line and make it widely possible for more people from all over the world learn new ways to manipulate art materials and create with them. Heck it's a way of teaching now for all ages. 

The hard part is hanging out with Human's in the field you work in...it's good for bouncing ideas off each other.  Not sure how that is, I've been swaying in an out of art leagues and centers for a while now.  The focus staying mainly on my home base stuff, studio work and online teaching and staying connecting with people through social media.  Good, bad and the ugly has come down to letting it unfold. And letting things be revealed.  Projecting what will happen if...is a place that doesn't serve well.  

Now that my four children/ Adults are all out of the house there is some moving around and painting that needs to be done and slipping that in, seems more important than trying to put my time in volunteering at a art league or center for the sake of keeping my presence out there for possible sales.  Crazy,  but it has been a way I've been taught to think...and honestly sales have been happening and teaching classes has been happening all the way through this year. So there is proof the Ego is Lying. 

When you are the chief bottle washer and cook...you are prone to some self talk moments and wisdom knowing. 

Getting grounded and balanced is what I would like to keep going on....