A daily dose of collage creativity, in images, words and thoughts. Always remember, "Everything will be alright in the end...if it is not alright it must not be the End"

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Stick with it baby...just stick with it.

Morning mediation, grabbed out of the zip lock bag of magazine scrapes and this what I got...

After just going through the motions not knowing what the out come will be or would be...I'm glad to say the Gal is back on the horse...

To many personal expectation I set upon myself and well I said "F" this and I went to the studio and start tacking down some paper to the my largest of the four wood panels for the next totem-tall piece.

It really bothers me when I set out to do something and I know  how to do it and can't get back there to do it, not no more... Break is over for me...I know I was on a few days kicking and screaming inside to not do any holiday stuff...hard to do and stop to do the family/holiday/shopping etc.  obligations...probably some form of a work alcoholic syndrome or something I've got...?

Any ways new video program is working...Husband sat with me this morning and held my hand as I poked around and put a video together that is for my next class on line...a bit of a lengthy one  and well I've been wrestling with it for a week.  it's not perfect by far but it's done and I'm happy about that. I've got one more to do and then some writing for the handout/pdf's...I went and advertise I was going to teach in Jan 2015...I was going to take that down off my blog here but thought to leave it up for motivations-fire under my butt...kind of things, you know.

I'll be heading into the city by myself today for a two hour seminar, Next Level    so best get going on things...

Friday, December 19, 2014

Taking a look at my older works...

 12 x 12
 12 x 12
 14 x 34
 12 x 30
 24 x 48
 12 x 30
 40 x 40
 small piece 2" x 6" 
12 x 36 
I woke up this morning and wonder....which can be exciting....as I am not being majorly prolific during this holiday season...I know I have a tendency to shut down...fear that it's a creative block or something worse...?

Crazy pants for sure...this whole year I've been aware of  how every day and some times every minute acceptance is called on and to just be.  So opposite of my nature...

One of my favorite sayings is...I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.  As I come to acceptance again the uneasiness settles and there's a natural calm.

I got out of the shower and looked at this piece...hanging in the bathroom.  
I like to make landscapes like this...I love to layer my papers..and break the layers of the middle ground, up creating a variety of interest.  So as I continue the acceptance of the season and that I'm not as prolific as I have been...I wonder and ponder about the next pieces...I so badly want to get back to the idea of tall works...I call totems.

So this is a bit lengthy but all self-discovery has purposes as of staying open and not stuck.  I seem to like the vertical as much as I like the square format...acceptance of what comes natural is another part of this all...Famous words..."Find something you love and you never have to work a day in your life"  Well when you go with the flow and the natural inner guidance I think the work becomes easy and less of a burden....I have to watch the word Dread and what that's all about...(fear) and work with a flow....which is faith. Personal direction from a spiritual adviser.   

I posted the work for myself...I know it sounds crazy but when seeing so much out there on Inter Web as the guy from Fast and Loud would say...one can get caught up and forget the path they were on...so not comparing... more so redirection and get back to where "I'm to be."   The whole purpose for this holiday break is for this....though painful sometimes...I'm so grateful I can get through and continue on. Not seeing growth right away...can bring on impatience but knowing and trusting the important growth is underneath where not many really know or have to know about. 

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Cut the us vs.them and why don't we all start caring again...

Sharing a
How to better connect and communicate with your employees.
By Mark Eagle
Clear internal communication is absolutely essential for a business to function. It prevents confusion about tasks and goals. It also contributes significantly to positive employee engagement with the company and with each other, therefore making for a more productive team.
The biggest obstacle to great communication is the manager/employee barrier, where managers are worried about becoming too friendly with people they are in charge of, and employees find it difficult to relate to those they perceive to possess more authority than they do. To break down this barrier, try                                                                          implementing these ten tips.

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

A while back....about a month ago

 I witness the town of Darien trying to help out the flood area that seems to be acting up again on the other end of town. We seem to handle things around here for now but not for long as the cattails do what they do and grow and grow and grow like rabbits...that growth then layers up and decomposes in to a marshy earthly sentiment, which is filling the Basin. Every year around early spring I feel it's a duty to clean what I can around this area...the municipal fella's are to clean it but that doesn't happens... About three years into doing this the Neighbors started to help and now we all keep a watch for what we can pick up and dispose of correctly.  After the burn that didn't' work well because the cattails are in a wet basin of course and when the heat was burning the tops off the water wicked up and stopped any burning process that was to happen. the winds were blowing so it should have burned nice.   I couldn't believe that they were burning cattails...but they do..do this. If they want to not have the cattails the will have to invest lots of money to dig them out...and haul out the dirt.

So for the last month of driving and walk by with the dogs all I seen was the trash that was thrown in there. It wasn't visible and it just was eating at me so this past Sunday Morning instead of walking dogs or taking a walk in the woods... I went out for about two and a half hours in my big rubber boots and rubber glove with my hoe and about 4 big garbage bags to clean up. (the family...there's goes mom again.)

little selfie...

Happy to say I filled three and found a brand new trash bag full tossed out there and a muddy rusting mail box...it's cleaned up and my heart isn't aching to see that all out there...I think about the old story.

Once upon a time, there were four people; their names were Everybody, Somebody,
Nobody and Anybody. Whenever there was an important job to be done, Everybody was
sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. When
Nobody did it, Everybody got angry because it was Everybody¹s job.
Everybody thought that Somebody would do it, but Nobody realized that Nobody
would do it. So consequently Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what
Anybody could have done in the first place.

Take action where needed, be responsible and stop depending on someone else to do....what amazes me with this all is newspapers, left over plastic bags and alcoholic cans and gallon size bottles..and the mail box were the collection treasures... Add alcohol and be responsible...NOT   

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Kandinsky's 148th birthday today....

Vasily Kandinsky

Russian (Moscow, Russia, 1866 - 1944, Neuilly-sur-Seine, France)

Braunlich (Brownish)

painting | oil on cardboard

Source: http://www.sfmoma.org/explore/collection/artwork/167#ixzz3M4m020Iz
San Francisco Museum of Modern Art

Monday, December 15, 2014

Seen the Movie Wild

To start any projects right now around the house is silly for the Husband as it's the Holiday season so we decided to go on a date and see the movie Wild...He heard I wanted to see it and seen me reading the book...now my daughter Maddie has the book so it's cool.

Any ways he enjoyed it...thought it was a good movie..much like the movie "The Way" with Martin Sheen in it...

Well I'm going to get going on something today...got food shopping, holiday shopping...and I would like to walk myself in the woods so off and on with the day.

Really grateful for a great date with the husband-Randy...he's the man in my life...

Sunday, December 14, 2014

Rambling Rawness

Exhaled Expression, 8 x 14 collage on watercolor paper, Materials, Goodwill find of some handmade papers, box lid, painted drawing paper, acrylics, water soluble Neo II crayon, lyra graphite crayon, polymer and glazing mediums, sewing machine and hand stitching....going primitive...back to the crayons of my youth...feels so good.

I thought I was holding it together pretty good....but I lost it big time. Not proud if it but after losing my whole folder full of the possibility of a second on line class and the fact that I've not really been focusing on the art career and just not caring I knew I need to get to the studio.

If you can see the dark thick lines in the background of this piece....you can tell where I was. Frustrated...and hurting...dare I label the emotions. You betcha...got to know it and call it by it's name.

I then pulled out my sewing machine and just wanted to sew papers together.  I had a drying rack full of paper left over all coated from when I got back from the workshop at Crystal Neubauers at The Healing House Art Studio back in October, I think it was?  Any ways I grabbed all this hand made papers from hanging note pad thingy I found at the Goodwill and started sewing...The papers all rectangle shapes I just started placing down next to each other, sewing across and around no rhyme or reason...More like a maniac.

Totally creating from a place of the emotional edge and or like a tire blow out.  I know extreme but it was, I haven't had this happen in a long time...I remember seeing a video of the singer song writer Pink talk about where she gets the really good stuff to write and sing about  in her music. It's from places like this. The deeper emotional moments.  Though not the prettiest place to be or one that we would like to admit we go to sometimes, reality is...I was there. Thankful to say Was....

My computer is all working smoothly now and The Husband is the Man...incredible with his skills. We were planning on giving it-my laptop a new hard drive if that didn't fix the problems it was having then it would be a new computer/laptop...I really have a hard time spending that amount money so with his time and skills...I don't have to spend that or go that route.  "he's the Man"

Aftermath of change and learning new things and the time I spend so far at the computer writing....(weak link in my humanness make up)  and not getting into the studio like I was...had me standing at the ledge of a emotional crash....All the "Call for Artists" too coming in and my own personal exhibits I'm not getting ready for....so feeling this and knowing it was coming I ran up stairs and started on this piece above.

My husband, dear soul came to see how I was doing and I babble some randomness and just kept saying like a young child, " I just need to be here to create something," " Just let me be here for a while."  "Let me be Here."  I said, "do you know what it feels like when you have to go take a motorcycle ride and you know if you don't your going snap?"  and he understood.   And decided to go and do just that and get some new lighting to hang around the house and get new smoke detectors combo's with the CO detectors..he said, " he has a funny feeling..." What a combo of wildness that now has calmed to a very manageable state.  And I didn't eat funny processed foods or drug or drink a thing...?

I brought it the surface of the paper....without having do for something or show it was pure expression of exhaled emotion I couldn't take any more...I had to exhale....let it out...

I question the black color, why I seem to be drawn to use that and the red, white, yellow and gray?
I know the red is for the life force,  and I do love the way it brings life to what I'm expressing. The Black is about power...honoring it, the power of this life force in all of us and the living things on this planet.
Yellow is for growth, from the sun and our youth... and the white stands for the wisdom through all of this we know now that Gray matters...Ramblings Rawness...