Sunday, December 18, 2011

On to the next part...Becoming Large

It seems that the Walking in this World book is broken into three section for each week. Which is loaded with way to much good stuff and it so helpful to break it up and take it a section at a time.

So as I venture out, Expansion can be frightening. Growth can feel foreign, even "wrong" Julia shares with us. 
She shares a story about the three blind mice and the Elephant...that each of these mice took a different section and described what they felt... thinking that was the most of it...when in fact it wasn't...The joke , of course is the elephant was very like all of these things and that its sum is something larger then any of it's parts. 

I can relate to this section....One day we will feel very large and competent. The next day we will feel that yesterday's grander size was just grandiosity and that we are really much smaller and more wobbly that we knew.  Changing sizes, we go through growing pains and many of those pains are the pangs of an identity crisis.  We may pray about it only to discover prayer is not help:  God himself seems to be forging our new identity.  The more we pray for it to go away, the stronger it actually becomes.  Well I thought it was my hormones..ha ha ha..

But when we change sizes creatively we begin to wonder, Oh dear Now what kind of animal am I?  And this is where we begin to ask people to help us to know. This where we often get in trouble....My thoughts are if I'm really starting to get in tune with my creative side and my spiritual life why would I go to friends to find help...well friends that only see the tail or just the trunk...I really need some one with a bit more knowledge then that...sounds like I don't trust my friends...that's not it but what I truly need is someone that has had experience in the growth of a creativity life...

When you start to get bigger, it can scare both you and your friends/husbands too.  They worry about being abandoned or wondering now where they will fit in to your life now that you've become this big artist, composer, or writer...remember that's their insecurities not yours.  Oh you my wish that they support you the whole way but they can't always do that...because there doing their own growing hopefully.    You might even get some friends that will want to downsize you.  be aware, don't give up.

The tricky part about changing sizes creatively is that we want to keep our old friends but not our old identity. We can keep those who are willing to see more of the elephant. But some of our old friends may need -at least temporarily- to be declared off limits, those who see only the elephant's tail.  I hate to say it but theirs been some toxic moments that I've had to add some distance..for the well being of both parts and for the new growth that we might be's fragle and needs time to gain some strength.

As I read this section I can't help but think about my own children and their not being creative and still having growth and their friends not supporting them on that growth, not only for creative people expanding their new directions this is something for us all to realize and both sides of the coin too. I know I've falling in the pit of saying things that might hinder someones growth just because I thought I needed them to stay who they are and not change...That really is an impossible act to put upon someone..As they say "Change is inevitable."

Well despite all the changing going on, Julia shares, It's part of our cultural tradition to believe and act as if artists are crazy. Is it any wonder we sometimes feel that way ourselves? At our craziest-looking, we are sometimes our most sane.  We still have to stop and ask, What am I doing? What the hell are we doing? Who the hell are we, really?  For me at this time it's so important that I pull in some solitude and walk in the woods so I can answer these question..there is no way in hell that for all our lives lived on this earth we know exactly what were doing...that's just impossible, I know there's a few out there that think they know...

I guess this section of week two also has you looking at the possibility that say if your an painter and you keep getting these calling or directional pings to be a hand bound book maker maybe you might want to look into that a bit  and the expansion of your own creative life... And you will make and met new people and you will be happier that you did.  instead of wondering what if ? you should answer a call now and than so you have no regrets...

More sharing from Julia..Sometimes, we are so overwhelmed by our life events, so swamped by the needs and expectations of others and our own feelings of (over) responsibility, we can feel completely lost...Wandering in the dark woods of our life, as hapless and at risk as Hansel and Gretel...Where am I? And who am I?

Creating a wish list helps us remember who we are, it can help us take small concrete, creative actions to reinforce that identity.

My favorite statement...When we are active on our own behalf, we tend to feel less overwhelmed by the needs and wants of others.  I can't tell you how true that is, like preparing for the One of a Kind show just recently...I was involved on my own behalf,  and all the stuff that normally goes on in extend and close families  can hook you in and make you go a bit crazy and sap you of creative energies in the wrong ways. This is all left on the way side to take care of itself and themselves...a blessing for all involved..

At this point anyone that is following along on this blog lately probably  has lost interest with all my introspective work...but I have to say I'm getting excited for the new year just right around the corner and doing a bit of expansion in the creative realms...

After you make a wish list (about 5 things) take a closer look at that list and break down the wish and see if there is a small doable act you can do. Remember energy be gets energy...small doable acts add up to wonder and possibility.

Just found my goals for 2011 and had a look at it and on there was a wish list of sorts...kind of amazing to see what expansion this year had.

Well off to walk the dogs, hang out in the studio a bit this afternoon to produce the Tack Down Tuesday piece. 


  1. My dear Motherbear....the LAST thing I'm doing is losing interest!! It's all fascinating!! And I, too am looking forward to the new year and what it will bring!!

  2. it's a good place to be isn't it...looking forward~


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