Thursday, December 22, 2011

Back to studying my books

From connection to transformation

The gifts of Imperfection-by Brene Brown,

She defines her research as this... Connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they drive sustenance and strength from the relationship.  Powerful words...being seen, heard and valued.

Connection begets artist way book I hear Energy beget energy.  Isn't it that way...when we put the positive out with out realizing it you get the positive back...Brene, shares that we are wired for connection, it's in our biology. From the time we are born, we need connection to thrive emotionally, physically, spiritually, and intellectually.  from a book she read, Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships.. it's confirmed that we are hardwired for connection and that our relationships shape our biology as well as our experiences. The stronger we are connected to someone emotionally, the greater the mutual force. That connected-ness we experience in our relationships impacts the way our brain develops and preforms..  Our innate need for connection makes the consequences for disconnection that much more real and dangerous.  We may think that the new technology is for instance a connection.. It's been kind of an impostor for connection,  making us believe we're connected when we're really not-at least not in the ways we need to be.  We might be confusing communicative with feelings of connected.  Just because we're plugged in, doesn't mean we feel seen and heard.. In fact, hyper-communication can mean we spend more time on Facebook then we do face to face with people we care about.. She then shares about the myth of self-sufficiency. One of the greatest barriers to connection is the cultural importance we place on "Going it Alone," some how we've come to equate success with not needing anyone.

well now, I know I've watch my self and family members fall in to the false connection and we've always been the self-sufficient types...Well do it ourselves can't count on anyone else to be there for us kind of attitude.  Not that what one says,writes or studies should be taken for gold but it does raise concern and where we as a human race are headed to...dooms day ?  no but when we aren't aware ourselves of our own behaviors how can we every make the adjustments we need to, so we can continually grow...well I know some people don't think growing or changing at their age is something they need to be doing but some people have a need to make the changes because something is unsettling in them...I personal feel that if change needs to happen it's got to start with me first.. pointing the finger at someone else to blame is not being responsible for your own action.

So the need to connect, have compassion and the courage to embrace who you are to be.  I guess as an creative type/artist it just comes with the package, new ideas, new ways to look and  get to an ideas and carry it out has always been in my blood...Not that I'm a great problem solver like my husband but I do have some skillful ways about me that I've depended on for sometime and used and  has carried on into all aspect of my life.

Now to Transformation (week 2 last section) out of the book Walking in this World

Quote: But not only medicine, engineering, an painting are arts; living itself is an art. Erich Fromm

Experience teaches that life, and especially life in the arts, is an much about mystery as it is about mastery. To be successful we must learn to follow not the leader but our own inner leading, the "inspiration" artist have acknowledged through the centuries. "Something" is telling us to make art. We must trust that something.

It is a spiritual law that when we are ready to transform, transformation will come to us.  We are all conduits for the great creative energy that seeks expression in us and through us.  When we yearn to be different, it is not just our restless ego. It is our accurate response to the creative energy with in us that is seeking a new venue for expression.  We are all creative and we are, in turn, creations. Just as we get restless to make something new, so too our creator may be restless to make something from us.
Example: thinking of yoga and receive a yoga flyer. Clarify any wish or dream or goal and experience information, people, and opportunities to flow toward you.  The spiritual shorthand for this is the phrase "take one step toward God and discover that God has taken a thousand steps toward you"   "Call it open-mindedness" or the willingness to be always beginner but receptivity and openness characterized the temperament of all great artists. 

When we are changing size, we feel large, clear and powerful one day, tiny and defenseless the next. We feel euphoric and then we feel enraged. This is good this is healthy. It just doesnt' feel that way. Our identified self seems false. It is not false, Just incomplete. I remember realizing that the days I was confused I was actually grow in understand. little did I know but after the confused state past I could make the connection to it all and see how it was all laid out and worked out..

We may try several sets of creative hats and shoes looking for those that fit. This is normal natural, and to be encouraged. It is also very threatening to those who want an artistic career to progress in neat linear increments like a academic or professional career. Would that is could. More often we experience awkward growing pains as we grope toward a new identity role. 

The unfolding saga of life on all levels is one of constant transformation, constant changing of form. When we cooperate with our need and desire to grow, we are cooperating with a spiritual law. Even before we ask our coming needs are clear.

Art, and artful living, is a constant collaboration between what we are made from and what we wish to make ourselves,  or what I would like to add is connect with.  As we open ourselves consciously to inspiration and instruction as to our truest current form, we are lead not only to creativity but also to comfort. 

As a walking friend a while back shared with me..."You know Laura, You are comfortable in your own skin." 

So should I try to tie these together?  What I'm reading is the importance to have people in your life that you can connect with that are not going to belittle you or make you into their being.. We/I am a every grow being, that has a awesome brain that isn't used to is capacity but really would like to...and when I find people to share that with and I'm seen, heard and valued in conversation and connection that really is a wonderful base to start off with.  And then when I can be the receiver on the other end and see, hear and value another human being for who that are...connection is made and it's so important to feel that comfort that Julia talks about when we start making the transformation in our own creative personal growth... 

I have to admit I'm not always connecting in the way I would like to with others.  I seem to carry some unwanted not  so healthy to my growth stuff around...You know "Issues"  but I'm learning to let them stay where they are and not pick them up and lug them around like extra bags that weigh a ton...It really hampers a connection with another when you got that hanging around your neck.. So all this stuff  I'm studying and reading about is helping me look at my life these days..with taking a break some what, it has me going into my introspective mode and then this kind of stuff slips into my art all the time as my way to connection and express that connection.

Well on to wrapping a few more gifts today.

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