Woke up Early

I woke up early with my shadow side, might call it the poor me syndrome.  I let Gracie out side and to both our surprise we greeted a coyote on the other side of the fence.  A nice full bodied one too.  We has one running round with some mange, so sad, our neighbor tries to help them with medicine some time to get rid of the parasites. Any ways when I see a coyote for sure it has me look at this shadow side.  

There is much going on in all our lives.  We've got a full van load here.  When I get into the poor me's it's usually when I've not gotten good sleep, in my anxiety and thinking way to much about the future like it's going to happen the way my fear feeds me with.  And then I fall in to losing out on something because of another thing...stuck in my head circling.  The whole while nothing really has happened and quiet possibly won't.  

So with being up early, getting this whole word thing down on paper, I jump from one table of morning pages to the page of my altered book and do some art journaling. 

  

                            

This whole thing about the shape of the pear or the shape of all things.  It's been very comforting to have this to go to when I need to let go and connect to me.  The Elder care has offered me an opportunity to be here in my home taking care of her, MIL and getting paid for it.  But that means I've got 20 hours of videos to watch and some hoops to jump through.  Watching these videos has me forced to see the future of elder care.  As of totally bedridden.  And that's scary and frightening for all.  So art is my salvation through life's messy and beautiful bits. 

Have you ever hear of a "Spiritual Warehouse?"  It's the place my my husband and I are pulling from.  It's about each time things don't turn out the way we might like it to be, we can learn to accept the situation and take care of ourselves.