An Elder that has passed

 I'm listening to a CD about how to become an Elder by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, As she describes what an elder is I'm picturing my Aunt Gerry.  She as an important Aunt for me as I was growing up.  My mother need help with watching my sister and we were brought to my Aunt Gerry house.  It was at a time that was prior to my parents divorce and my heading into High School...

With working in the North Directions...about the elders and wise ones, they lived and made a path for us to follow as we are doing for generations to come.   These picture are from her obituary page.  

She passed after my Dad this year...as you can see the elders have been in my heart and mind.  The inside work that I've chosen to do this year...I think chose me but whatever I'm doing it.  And part of being an elder for myself is to heal, heal the past and let go, this I heard from Clarrisa's CD yesterday...

I keep getting signs like this and I'm not running away from them...tearfully and with courage I've been walking through it.  

So the things I remember about my Aunt Gerry is she had 5 children and all older then I accept Bobby who was my age or a year older.  Here house was simple, spacious, and tidy.  The kitchen was big, not huge but I was young so everything back then look bigger right.  She was always baking, I think she like to bake, with all the kids and people coming over she always had home baked goods...which I loved.  She had her space, a sewing room off to the west side of the house.   With all the older girls sewing was a big thing back then as of making your own clothes.  

I also remember my Aunt Gerry wasn't afraid of speaking her mind and laughing with such a loud joyful sound, it was great.  Made me come running to the kitchen to see what all the fuss was about while my mom was visiting. I believe my Aunt Gerry divorced my Uncle Wally around the same time and left my Aunt working...but she was a type that keep working way past retirement. Much like a few other Elders I know in our close family.  Providing for and making sure needs were tended to is gift to those that they support.  A form of Love and responsibility like non other.  Good Work ethic is what I saw.  That is how I was brought up with good work ethics....

So working with the North Direction...in the process of healing, this direction assists to acquire motivation, knowledge, education, and is the beginning to lead by example as our elders, teachers and mentor have done for us.  We call on them along with the energy of the Great Buffalo to guide us when we are feeling discourage and fatigued, when our monkey mind is trying to get the best of us and pull us back into past patterns.  As the Bear energy was called upon for the West...now the Buffalo for the North... 

The point about this directions that I'm picking up is the monkey mind and old patterns...The north is our fuel source for endurance, confidence and courage to keep showing up and get through any challenges with an awareness to catch our thoughts from  overtaking our abilities.  

This year as I mentioned has been guiding us all in ways we had not expected and to have our thoughts take over our abilities...Wow I can relate to it...what is our purpose....and how are we going to make it.  My faith and now trust is in nature.   That is a power so huge and we have seen how fast she comes back to life. What can I use from all this rambled typing on the blog and inner work?  

Keep showing up,  but I had to rest...taking this month off of August from pushing out my marketing and promotional stuff to keep working as a teacher and artist was what I had to stop... I didn't lay down and stop like I was dead...No I have taken a class online, explored parts of me through this healing and sharing with other elders that understand what I'm going through.  Not many want to look deep inside and I feel I had no choice... My time is now...

One of the books I read was White Buffalo Calf Woman...that was a heavy, spiritual read for sure.  She taught the Lakota People, all things are inter connected an that it is not necessary to struggle to have abundance.   Every part of the Buffalo was used. The Buffalo would stamped but mostly they stood there and gave of themselves for food, shelter and clothing.   Prayers of gratitude were offered up to Great Spirit by the tribes. Post hunt ceremonies were preformed that honored the Buffalo Spirit.  

I know it was a movie but such a good one and that was Avatar...the prayer and honor given to the creature that gave it's life for others to live...

With out the Buffalo the tribes would not have survived the harsh winters.  We are now all going through a season of harshness right? 

One lesson of the abundance, use whatever resources are available. On a deeper level, one must appreciate what one already has. 

How often do you focus on what is lacking  in your life rather than counting your blessing? 

How much richer are our lives when we are truly thankful Meaningfully for what we have? 

This sends a powerful message to the Universe.  

This path through the North of the Medicine will continue....

If you want to work on your art...you have to work on your life and right now the connections is both.