confused and uncertain

Yesterday...I thought that I was slipping in a nice little afternoon walk in the woods. I had gotten my one piece back from the photographer and both my prints were done. A plus, now I don't have to go back next week and all my work will be read for the shows hanging tomorrow.  So with packaging up the two last prints I gathered myself and went to the woods.

Well I as walking around the one section just before the old driveway that is grown over with grass now. You see there was a house there but the elder pass away and donated all the land to the forest preserve.  So as you come around the one area on the main path you can see from a distance if there would be anyone walking there. Well there was a middle aged man, and I could see from his gestures he was zipping up his jacket.. thinking nothing of it I kept walking and then as I came closer to where the grasses driveway path meets the main path I looked up that way to see if the man was still there.
Well he was and had his pants down to his ankles and was holding up his jacket in an odd way...I so quickly turned my head and eyes away and the first thing I was thinking was I don't want him to see that I saw that...I'm just going to be walking by and not look again and put a fast pace on my walk and get some more distance between the two of us...my second thought was Omgosh something isn't right here...something is totally wrong what about all the other people walking the path around here and has he been here before emerging out of the woods like that and what about all the elders out there walking and the woman who take pictures of the deers...no this isn't right.  At that point I realized I choose not to bring my phone with me because I just wanted to not worry about anything and be distracted. When I got back to my van I called my daughter and wonder what I should do.  Well the next thing is I did go to the police station..knowing it was to late to really do anything but I wanted to make them aware that his was going on out there...

Now it's the morning after and I'm going to go out to the woods again...crazy yes but the woods is my place to find some peace and I'm not going to be victimized by this image... I have such great tension in my shoulder because of this and I didn't sleep well.  I have experienced something that was not appropriate in public to see and I have to admit I was also thinking what next would this person do?  trying not to feed my fear.  I wasn't violated like a person who might have had her purse stolen or molested but really it's some kind of weird feeling to shake off.

As I got home from being at the police department I had to share with the family...truthfully it kind of messes up my whole experience in the woods.  I have to look at it as this person is sick and needs some help I hope he finds it soon.  I wear my gym shoes and I'm able to run all over the woods, I know them well as I've been walking and granny running out there for going on 7 years..I've followed deer paths and found coyote dens so I have an exit plan. 

Going to face my fear and keep my woods medicine pure.