Checks in the Mail-with much gratitude

 I received this today...

I was feeling a bit low yesterday and thinking of the rest of the month and going into December....which is never good to over think and try to super plan things.  While doing my morning mediation's and journal writing the word fear was hiding till I asked myself what I was afraid of...and then I let it dribble out on the paper.  I'm afraid of how my booth will look, I'm afraid I won't pick the right work for the events coming up and I'm afraid of looking like a fool. Lala land thinking is...I want it to be perfect.  This seems to always happen as I'm in the process of working on a show/exhibit or in this case a four day event I get bit of anxiety...What I've done about it this time is... pin point what I'm anxious or afraid about. What I'm afraid about are things I can't honesty know till I get there...and just making that statement for myself help me stay real about it and not go off. Also trusting that the help that I've received this far will be there when I need it.  My spiritual support, family and friends.  So goofy when the mind has you running in circles.  Time to back away from the bus that keeps circling and keep the feet on the ground and stand straight.

I'm working on things at ever step getting my little ducks in a row which I hate to think like that...I should say I'm taking my small steps, so I don't get overwhelmed and it's working and these small glitches in the process are just little wake up calls that let me know I'm in my "norm" and that I can work through all this and be OK.. so much gratitude for where I'm at right now.

I've been able to work at what I love to do and I've created a job for myself. Which I'm kind of missing but always good to take a break and recharge or fill the well. (teaching my collage classes) Plus the holiday season is upon us and what a wonderful time to take a break from the teaching so I can focus. 

So with all the anxiety and fear that was upon me yesterday morning I share with a group of creative types which is always a healthy thing to do and then I went about my day and started on sewing my panels for the OOAK show.  As the day went on the Husband was home, Rain day and he gathered up the mail...and there in a big envelope was the certificate and the check.  I had know I was an award winner Gretchen let me know by email,  which was very cool with me and then to find out I won a bit of $ that was the Icing on the cake...I have to say it never fails when I feel a bit of a low in the doubting fields something comes along and straights my thinking right up.. I don't plan it but it happens and I'm so grateful.

We've  had a wild thing happens to my second oldest daughter.. where she parks at the El stop she got out of school Monday night and started her Jeep up and it was sounding so strange and really loud she was afraid to drive it home.  Call her dad and with my son's help went out to Forest Park and checked it out...It seems that some one cut her catalytic converter right off...and we found out through the kids sharing on Face book that they sell them for like 120.00...Sad and just makes you feel weird when people steal from you or take what is not theirs... Luckily with much gratitude the Husband is able to fix things like that...not to happy about it but found out he didn't have to buy a new one and could add a straight pipe on and it would be good as the Jeeps have a few catalytic converters on them not just one...

"just a little daily drama going on and life's messy bits."

Oh my bin and pedestal came yesterday too and I was able to use some nice material between a buff and grey, add some accent to them and pull the display together for the OOAK show..

Just doing the next right thing and moving forward...but today is a me day, need to fill the well of possibilities with some simple pampering and powdering...