Creative Scar tissue

Working through some stuff here and one of the best ways for me to do that it do go to the studio, or walk the woods.  I decided to go to the studio.  

 
I'm reposting a picture of my stamps I just made a couple of weeks ago. My Favorite one at the top on the right.  The one that looks like a stack of rocks or a bee hive.   I got a chance to use it yesterday in my Tack Down Tuesday piece. 
 
So what's this all about, In the first week of the Artists Way book some of the task work has you Time Traveling to visit three old enemies of your creative worth.   Well, I feel that I've dealt with a lot of them. But I came back from picking up my art from the gallery yesterday thinking I would be good with it but I wasn't...I have to admit I was feeling a hint of failure. I know that's not true... and I had to get my head straight with it... so ate some lunch and went to the studio and started creating a piece for Tack Down Tuesday...
 
Julia Cameron shares- That more monster will come to you as you work through your recovery. It's always necessary to acknowledge  creative injuries and grieve them. Otherwise, they become creative scar tissue and block your growth. page 38 in Artists Way. 
 
Ok here goes,  I'm hurting even though I made the choice to pull out.  I'm hurting because now when people ask what galleries are you in I don't have anything to say...well I'm Still in The Flying Pig, (just picking up my work this weekend for the winter and will see about next April if I can continue.)  But the EGO is crushed...I can't run around and boast/toot my horn about where this work's at, and I'm in some Gallery, blah. blah, blah...Crazy, I know but if I don't address this Ugly now....It will fester big time.
 
Head straight now...I've decided to pull in the work and expand a bit more local and work my neck of the woods a bit more and see what happens, maybe move the artwork to the west a bit, as of as far as Aurora area and then try to submit works for out of state shows....ideas, nudges, intuition, good orderly direction...but it's still hard to end something.  I won't be able to babble on about being in a gallery in the City...all ego stuff, but stuff that socially is asked when people meet you, as an "Artist"...So what will I say when asked?  The truth...I'm contracting a bit/regrouping and preparing for expansion in other areas. Getting ready to explore new territory.  
 
And I end this with a Creative Affirmation- from page, 36 
My Creative always leads me to truth and love...  
 
Being Raw...Real, Awesome, and Whole is the Goal for this Gal.
 
Ok off to teach class this morning...feeling much better now...little clarity always helps.
 

Comments

  1. I hear you. This healing stuff is big work. And learning to protect yourself from outside voices and impressions is a full-time love yourself job, isn't it ?
    Brava for picking up such sweet tools!

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  2. Some of the gallery artists aren't in books. They are a bit slower to accept the art form as they have to convince their collectors of that. Keep healing, it's looking great!

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  3. Just think of all the commission you are NOT PAYING! You are FREE to create the way God meant you to create and not to please a gallery or their limited clientele. The internet is so much bigger. You do it for the joy of it and it will reward you.

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  4. PS Your stamps are fantastic!

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  5. Thanks all....it's a process life and we got to go through it and come out all grown up on the other side and wiser for it.

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  6. Yes, can't say my work is hanging anywhere. Can say I've sold some, but mostly to friends, and what do they know except they love me!!!

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Thank you for support, interest and viewing my inner life with my outer life on this Blog. Wishing you many creative blessings and peace to you and yours,
~v~Laura

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